Thin Blue Mind / Smokey Heroes
Police Psychology: Anger!! Part 2 Seeing Red
by Gary S. Aumiller, Ph.D. ABPP
There are many that believe the expression of “seeing red” comes from when a Matador wants a bull to charge, he waves a red cape at him. The theory is the bull “sees red” and gets really angry and charges. Humans that “see red” get very angry and lose control. In reality, bulls are red-green color blind and don’t see the color red. A bull’s vision is like: (see below)
A Man Sees
A Bull Sees
As you can see there is a lack of color in the picture of what the bulls sees. Bulls charge at movement, not color. But we still use the expression anyway.
When you are working with children on anger control, one exercise you often us is to use the metaphor of the turtle. The turtle hides in his shell when things go awry, and he collects himself until he feels it is safe again. You teach the child that the turtle is a smart animal because he hides away from the things that can damage him, and sometimes emotions can damage you, so you have to “hide away” from them until you get yourself collected. Everything stops inside the shell. We work with kids on putting their hands up over their head when they are upset, making an imaginary shell. We even tend to give the turtle a “T” name like, Tucker the Turtle. Tucker tucks away when upset or angry. And so forth and so on. (more…)
reactive, in particular, not reacting out of anger. We all experience moments of frustration—moments where we just feel like lashing out at everyone and everything around us because things aren’t working out for us in the ways we wanted. Frustration is the emotion we feel when we are being opposed, blocked from reaching a goal we want, or barred from doing something we want to do. Frustration is very common, and it is nothing to be ashamed of. Frustration can also range from mild to severe, depending on the circumstance. For instance, if you wanted to make it through a green light before it turned red, but by the time you got there it was too late, you’d probably experience minor frustration. On the other hand, if Notre Dame football has another defensive lineman injured on a jet sweep from a stupid cut block and the referee refuses to call it because he hates the Irish when they have a supposedly inferior opponent… wait I am losing it again. I need to find a wall to punch.
over, I call this “Cycling”—spinning the frustration into anger, saying the same thing over and over until anger builds from your frustration, and then frustration from your anger. Cycling is a never-ending mess which can have some dangerous consequences, especially if it leads you to say something you know you will regret later. It is not uncommon for this cycling to turn into something psychologists call the frustration-aggression-displacement syndrome (everything is a syndrome in psychology). Frustration-aggression-displacement is when you are frustrated at something or someone, but you know you can’t do anything about it. For instance, it is not going to be helpful to yell back at your boss or teacher when they do something that frustrates you, because they have a higher authority than you do, and getting angry with them won’t help assuage your frustration. So, what do you do? You go home and yell at your wife, or your children, or you kick your dog, or yell at a waiter, or go into a road rage by driving like an idiot—you lash out at people who can’t or won’t fight back. In doing so, you are alleviating your frustration through aggression directed at people who are not responsible for your frustration. This is not only unhealthy for you and the people around you, it is also dangerous, and can lead to a downward spiral of increasingly harmful behavior. And research shows it can lead to heart attacks, cancer, rashes, organ dysfunction, etc. Yes, the open expression of anger and frustration has been shown in statistical research to be worse than holding it in. Sort of the opposite of what shrinks have told us in the past.
The mere presence of the phone made the conversation less personal and less complete. Further studies show that if there are seven college kids at a table, only three will be involved in a conversation at any one time. Maybe four. The rest will be on their phones. And finally, studies at Kent State University show for 500 cell phone using kids, at different levels of use, the high frequency cell phone users tended to have a lower GPA, higher anxiety, and lower satisfaction with life (happiness) relative to their peers. Let me TEXT that to you while it sinks in.